All while having mixed feelings towards the Miss Heilala pageant, I found myself in a place of curiosity and feeling compelled to step towards a platform that, for me, was more about service than beauty. This opportunity gave light to a season of growth, and learning to do things outside of my comfort zone. I stand by my response during my interviews, that it is the people who make the home. My village showered me with such love and support when embarking in this journey of the unfamiliar.
Behind the scenes of any major event, it's easy to get lost in the allure of the final product—the lights, the cameras, the applause. But the reality is far more demanding, involving countless hours of training, fittings, and meticulous organization. Each detail requires careful attention, from networking to campaigning, all while mentally and physically preparing for the challenges ahead. My village was my pillar throughout this journey. I had to balance multiple responsibilities, such as working full-time and pursuing a master’s degree. This journey was about more than just the crown; it was about appreciating the process, pushing limits, and finding strength in the chaos.
In a world where ideal beauty standards are relentlessly pursued and measured, the journey was a grueling test of endurance, both physically and mentally. Betrayal and disappointment weave themselves into the fabric of these competitions, as trust erodes and the truth reveals itself to be far from what was promised or shown. Nonetheless, it was a learning lesson of staying true to oneself. I found myself navigating landscapes from the pressure to conform, unhealthy habits and public opinions, it was a daunting place to be in. Each step forward was a test of resilience, pushing the boundaries of what it means to endure in a world that measures value by the narrowest of margins.
Amid the trials that tested my spirit, I found a new appreciation for the village that raised me and surrounds me, a collective of souls who have stood by me through every storm. New relationships have flourished in this journey, connections that were unexpected yet deeply meaningful, adding layers of strength to my ever-evolving story. The character I see in the mirror now is one built through these trials, shaped by the challenges but not defined by them. Through it all, I’ve built a stronger “why”—a purpose rooted not just in the battles I’ve fought, but in the legacy I wish to leave behind.
The stories and traditions that once felt distant are now the lifeblood of my identity, grounding me in a history rich with wisdom and resilience. There is a profound love that wells up within me, a love that honors the sacrifices of those who came before me and celebrates the vibrant heritage they preserved. This Heilala experience has been an awakening for me, there is a new sense of belonging to my culture, and an immense pride in being a Tongan woman. This identity, once a part of me, now pulses as the core of my being, guiding me with a sense of direction that feels both ancestral and newly discovered.
There is a proverb: Papata pē, ka na’e lalanga
Life is full of twists and turns, good and bad, though often unexpected and challenging, they are the very threads that weave a fulfilling journey.
In reflecting on this journey, I am deeply humbled by the unwavering support of my village, a community that has embraced me from the beginning and stood by me with steadfast love and belief in my potential. The warmth of those who have known me all my life, combined with the respect earned from those who I won over along the way, fills me with immense gratitude. To hear that even members of the royal family favored me as a contestant is truly an honor for my family and I. Thus, affirming that I am doing something right in representing my true, authentic Tongan self. This recognition is not just a personal achievement, but a reflection of the collective strength and resilience of my village, and I am committed to carrying this legacy forward with pride and integrity in all that I do even after my reign as Miss Apraxus New Zealand.
